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Man Up, Albany…Wait, Seriously?

14 Nov

Miller’s new billboard campaign reads “Man Up, [fill in the blank city].”  On my way home from Latham tonight I saw three Miller Lite billboards telling me to “Man Up.”  This bothers me on multiple levels.

First of all, I am a drinker of Miller Lite.  If I am going to have more than six beers, it’s usually Miller Lite.  Why?  Because for light beers it sucks less that Coors, Busch, Bud and Keystone…not because I enjoy it.  There has never once been a time in my life where I’ve felt like more of a man drinking a Miller Lite.  It was a diet decision for me.  I used to be the dark prince of Bud Heavies.  Shut up.  I was also on Lipitor at 21.  I feel like a total asshole drinking Miller Lite.

This is the other level it bothers me on.  Fran Fudge and Connie the Cat Lady Get Mad About Beer.  Ladies…Miller is dumb.  This campaign is dumb.  “A recent study shows that 9 out of 10 Miller Lite drinkers are misogynists…”  No.

Next time, how about claiming that your beer is quadruple hops brewed.  God dammit.  I already undergo enough scrutiny for being a pansy.

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Ellicottville Pale Ale

8 Nov

American Pale Ale

Rating: B-

Poured from bottle to pint glass.

Light amber with a one finger tiny-bubbled head.  Lacing is very thin and trails throughout.  The aroma is by far the most satisfying part of this beer: flowery hops, grapefruit, apple cider, honey-sweet malt.  I wish I could say that the taste is as satisfying.  There is nothing fundamentally wrong with it; it is a decent balance of citrusy hops and sweet malt, but it doesn’t live up to the aroma.  The mouthfeel is a little too watery to be satiny and so it’s kind of flat on the taste buds despite the medium carbonation.  It is rather drinkable despite its lack of complexity from a taste standpoint.  This was the first Ellicottville that I’ve tried, and although I wasn’t wowed, I’m making a mental note to pick up a sixer of another one of their beers.  Not bad.

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Hill Street Cafe

7 Nov

I’ve collapsed right here—————————————–^

That being said, I consider myself lucky to live as close to this place as I do.  Good beer selection, great food, and friendly service.  I love that they have Southern Tier 2X IPA on tap.  I love that the pool table isn’t terrible and has an even roll.  I love their pizza (seriously, it’s the best non-pizzeria pizza I’ve had in a long time).  I love that they don’t throw me out when I’m shwasted.  I love that I can watch any NFL game on Sunday there.  Except for last Sunday when the Bills jobbed.

It is also probably the best bookend bar that I’ve ever been to.  What is a bookend bar?  A bar that you can start and finish your nights at.  It’s only about two blocks from my apartment.  I’ll start at Hill St. at 8pm on a Saturday night and end up back there at 3:30 for a couple of rounds.  I just wish the walk home wasn’t uphill.

The clientele is largely locals.  Don’t be surprised if you see two or three familiar faces every time you pop in.  Overall, it’s a good crowd. Nobody’s looking for a fight…unless somebody hijacks the jukebox and plays something other than mid-late 90’s alternative rock.

Buy me a beer and I’ll buy us a round of electronic cricket.

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Stone Levitation Ale: Gravity Rides Everything

30 Oct

At the rate I’ve decided to do beer reviews, Evan is going to have to change the name of this blog to “the self hating hopster.” (See what I did there?)  I’ve been reviewing so much beer I feel there could be a Joanie Loves Chachi-like spin off to this Happy Days of a blog somewhere down the line.  For now, I remain your faithful servant in amateur beer reviews.

To that point, I’ve noticed that Continue reading →

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Fall Beer Guide 2011: Pumking Down!

19 Oct

The fall is undoubtedly the best season for craft brewing in the country.  The Great American Beer Fest kicks things off in Denver, and countless beer gardens and taprooms celebrate Oktoberfest across the country.  As we approach the holiday season, another shift in seasonal beer availability is not too far off.  (In fact, Magic Hat has already been shipping it’s holiday sampler pack.)  So to honor the now fading harvest moon, here is a list of the top ten pumpkin beers I have had this season.

10.  St-Ambroise Pumpkin Ale (Citrouille) (Montreal, QB) – Labeled “The Great Pumpkin” in the US, this Canadian offering doesn’t leave much room for interpretation.  Bland, but not at the risk of saying it was bad.  Drink it if you’re curious about Canadian ideas regarding pumpkin.

Continue reading →

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Long Trail Brewing Co. – Triple Bag Ale

17 Oct

Forgive me for not following the guidelines to a traditional beer review.  Websites like Beer Advocate and others have a formulaic process with lots of things I don’t know what has to do with beer.  I’ve had a lot of craft beer over the last year attempting to sound even remotely like I know what I am talking about.  Most extended trips I’ve taken have involved trying to find local brews and bombers exclusive to the given area.  I’ve bartered with friends from across the country for seasonal selections and other microbrews.  I still feel I have no idea what I am doing.  Be that as I may, I am here to give it a try.  If you know me well enough, you’d know I am a card carrying supporter of the Long Trail brewery located in Northern Vermont, about 120 miles from Albany.  Their flagship Long Trail ale is my favorite everyday beer.  Their strong ale Double Bag is a darker, nuttier brew that was once only reserved for those who came to visit the brewery as a token of appreciation.  It’s popularity led the brewery to brew Double Bag throughout the year.  Occasionally they up the ante to their version of an American Strong ale, the subsequent Triple Bag.  It’s a lot like Double Bag of course, but just with the volume turned up.  The chocolate aroma and malty flavor are ever present, with enough hops to balance things out.  The alcohol content increases from 7.2% to 8.2% providing a warm finish like most higher alcohol beers.  This isn’t your average Sunday afternoon beer.  This will put you on your ass.  If you’re interested in trying it, I’d start with a Double Bag.  If you’re not impressed, I can’t say this will do much more for you.  On the contrary if you’re into it, be sure to pick up a four pack at your local beverage center.

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Lagunitas IPA

16 Oct

American IPA

Rating: B+

On tap at City Beer Hall in Albany, NY.

Very clear dark amber in color with a ½ inch bubbly, off-white head.  Nose has piney hops, citrus and a bready malt back.  Initially, the taste is aggressive and bitter with the hops, though that is quickly balanced by caramel malt sweetness.  Light-medium body with mid-hi carbonation.  Creamy on the tongue with a clean, satisfying finish.  It has a great drinkability and although it really should not be a session beer with a 6.2% ABV, I have made it one on a number of occasions.  Not my favorite IPA (Smuttynose IPA), but I will definitely order this beer out again or bring a 6’er home to slam with a pizza.

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The Wedding

10 Oct

I have not posted in a couple of days because I had a weekend wedding getaway at a resort in the Catskills.  You may be wondering if it was my wedding.  It wasn’t.  My friends John and Carrie got married after being engaged for over a year.  I’m still a tiger out there, and you can’t put a leash on a tiger (translation: I spend many horny nights alone at home).

There are few different kinds of weddings:

1)      You are the friend and guest of Continue reading →

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Hazed & Infused

4 Oct

American Pale Ale

Rating: B-

Poured from bottle to pint glass.

Pours a cloudy amber with a 3-finger white head.  Leaves striated lacing.  The aroma is the most impressive thing about this beer.  It has a caramel malt, piney hops, minty and floral.  The taste is much less compelling; it is basically like a bland version of the aroma.  The mouthfeel is smooth , light-medium body, light carbonation and a very dry finish.  I’d like to try this on tap somewhere to see if it’s any tastier, but I will not be buying the beer again anytime soon.

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The Black-out Beast

2 Oct

Some months ago, my friend Snacky and I moved into a new apartment downtown in Albany’s Mansion District.  Immediately, we discovered that it was only a 4-minute walk to Hill St. Cafe.  It is my favorite bookend bar: beginning and ending nights.  This post concerns ending nights…

With very few exceptions, like private parties or sporting events, the clientele is largely locals and you’ll see the same faces over and over again.  There is one face…one blimpy, pock-marked face that turns up after 3am.  And watch out, because she prays on guys who have had too much to drink!

The Black-out Beast.

Snacky and I have decided to refer to her in mixed company as “BoB.”

She’s about 5’6″, 220 lbs. and absolutely poured into her unflattering dresses, most of which look like you could have a family picnic on.  She’s the type of girl that no amount of alcohol could make her bangable.  This creature will drag men who cannot talk, let alone walk, back to her slampig cave and, oh god, I just swallowed bile.  Some of the men I never see again and so it’s possible that she has devoured some of her victims.

I’ve found that the best defense tactic is to drink in the buddy system.  I’m also pretty sure that she can’t see if you’re not moving.

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