It’s that time again. That 3-5 week period where we pretend like we’re going to start exercising or flossing. Where we forget how old we are because we assume that our birthdays are in someway related to the calendar year. Where we are reminded that we are now one year closer to the apocalypse…whoops, now it’s months away.
I have made a list of a few things that I want to make happen in 2012:
1) Try more competitive eating challenges. I always had a knack for it and I’d like to start making some money for going to pound town.
2) Launder my bed sheets more often.
3) Related to 2: Stop falling asleep eating peanut butter.
4) Revive fake bands and record some music. I hope you hear me Well-Hung Paintings, Secrete & Deplete, Uppercut Ceilings…the list goes on. Teen_SQUISH will one day be the most important fake record label.
5) Actually beat the video games that I buy.
6) Actually watch to DVDs that I buy.
7) Actually read the books that I buy.
8, 9 & 10) Actually spend time reviewing 5, 6 & 7.
On a serious note, it is my sincere intention to start writing better articles and in a timely fashion. Although I frequently tell myself and others that I have no life, I’m a fairly busy person. These reviews take time and I need to make time because it’s important to me and I hope that a few of you get some enjoyment out of the shit.
If your New Years Resolution was to get involved with something creatively, get in contact with me via email at: selfhatinghipster@gmail.com . I can try and aid you in that process.
Happy 2012 to all. Health, happiness and hope the Mayans were wrong.
the self-hating hipster 
No more fast food for me. Marissa is so jazzed on me not eating nuggets anymore.