Tag Archives: Jets

Alternative NFL Awards 2011

4 Jan

The NFL closed the door on its regular season this past Sunday, with the New York Giants defeating the Dallas Cowboys on national television to secure the last available playoff spot.  It was a wild season that saw the revival of football in places like Cincinnati and Detroit.  We saw the meteoric rise and inevitable unraveling of Tim Tebow in a span of eight games.  Carson Palmer is on the Raiders now.  Santonio Holmes hates Mark Sanchez.  Ndamukong Suh decided to Nstomp a guy on Thanksgiving.  The Packers almost went unbeaten, and the Colts almost lost them all.  (Not to mention both streaks ended the same week.) This was the first full season without either Terrell Owens or Randy Moss since 1995. What the hell is going on?  Instead of giving awards based on the normal guard (MVP, Rookie of the Year, Coach of the Year, etc) I am going to make some of my own up, and award them as I see fit.   I would like to also accept all of these awards on behalf of whoever I decide to give them to.  Thank you so much, me.

Most Times Responsible for a Play Ending in My Audible Laughter – Mark Sanchez, QB (NYJ)

Let me be the first to tell you, I do not like the Jets.  I would never allow that to cloud my journalistic integrity though, and simply want to let you know I find the way Sanchez plays quarterback hilarious.  It’s like he’s blindfolded, or at least not wearing his contacts.  He throws a football like how Jackson Pollack threw paint, which is to say completely reckless.  He is on the cutting edge Continue reading